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Maternity & Parenting Center

Progress

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Today was a LONG day…Micah decided to wake up screaming at 5:00 am. Quite unusual for him, but his sleep habits lately have been a bit erratic. It is either from teething or because he senses some changes, but I have no idea! We tried bringing him into bed with us for a while, but Micah wanted to get up and play. By 6:00 or so, Elliot bit the bullet and agreed to let me sleep and bring Micah downstairs. I slept until about 8 and then joined them.

We took Micah to daycare after breakfast (and Micah was definitely difficult about breakfast again). It was a crazy day for me – we had a conference call for work at 11, and then I needed to go to my condo to wait for a cleaning service to clean the carpet and the HVAC repair guy to come and fix the broken AC. Luckily, the issue with the AC was fairly minor – apparently, one of the wires on the contact circuit burned out and just needed to be replaced. So, the AC is working again, the carpet is clean, and my condo is ready for sale! While we were waiting on the carpet cleaning, we had our architect come and meet us so we could review the bid from our contractor. We had a few questions we need to nail down, but we are in a good place, and we’ve okayed our architect to move forward and finalize things and start applying for permits!
When Micah got home from daycare, he wanted to play out back for a while – he was busy playing “basketball” – and he was just so cute!! He loves to throw the ball through the hoop and clap each and every time. We dragged him inside after 20 minutes to feed him dinner (I think Micah would live outside if he could). Unfortunately, he started to melt down while we tried to feed him dinner. He threw the chicken on the floor, and the cheerios, and he did not want to eat much fruit. He was just grumpy, and we were shocked that he refused the food. After a screaming fit, I decided that he was probably exhausted since he woke up at 5:00 am. We decided we would plop him in front of the tv to watch an episode of Word World before bed. At 7:45, Elliot took Micah upstairs for an early bath and bed. For the second night in a row, he screamed his head off at bedtime before crashing. I wish I knew what was going on with him!! Anyway, he has been sleeping soundly so far – I hope he is just exhausted and sleeps through the night tonight.
Things went pretty well for my mom today at her appointments. The good news is the gastroenterologist thinks he knows what is wrong and believes the issue is her stomach. The bad news is she has to go through several more tests to figure out how he wants to proceed with treating her, and it could be a bit of time before she really bounces back. She is having some other bloodwork done to see if there are any other crazy things going on that could be causing her exhaustion. Tomorrow she will go see her cardiologist and do a quick follow-up to make sure everything is in order. She has bloodwork and follow-up tests scheduled later this week, so hopefully she’ll get more answers and a plan of action by next week.
As for me…well, Twoey seems to be clawing her way out tonight. I’m having regular contractions and a lot of pain and pressure and tons of sharp stabbing pains. We’ll see if this is just another rough night or for real.

Adjusting

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I’m having a difficult time adjusting to life without my dog. It probably sounds crazy to you…especially those of you who do not have pets. I find myself looking for Nugget – unconsciously. I wake up in the night and notice she isn’t on the bed, so I sit up and search the room for her…until I remember that she is gone. I find myself glancing around the room and searching for her throughout the day, or checking my path as I walk to the bathroom to be sure I avoid tripping over her. I pause to hold the gate open as I go up the stairs to make sure that she can get through and follow me…only to realize that she isn’t there to follow me. I wake up at a noise in the early morning, and I peer over the edge of the bed, expecting Nugget to be there pawing at the side of the bed to tell me she is ready to get up and start the day. I miss her crazy “burrowing” that she does every morning when we all wake up, and her digging on the bed covers at night to make a comfortable spot for herself. I notice the odd silence (lack of jingling from her tags) and wonder what she has gotten into, and then remember why it is so quiet in the house. I find myself doing the defensive moves to rescue fallen food from the floor and grabbing stray dishes so that Nugget doesn’t have a chance to get in there and steal it…and then realize the food is safe now. Out of habit, I gave Micah a cheese stick earlier today and immediately picked him up and put him on the couch and started to stand guard so Nugget didn’t steal it from him – and then realized he could walk freely around the house (and even put the stick down on the coffee table) without any worries right now.
I’ve also learned that Nugget might have been the best housekeeper in this family – in the 3 days since her passing, this house has become a complete and utter mess! There are trails of crumbs and food all over the place – my carpet has never looked so disgusting! After 12 years, I have apparently developed horrible habits as well – I noticed today as I was eating a graham cracker and leaving a trail behind me that I had grown to rely on my furry little hoover who always stood right beneath me to catch my crumb trail. We are going to have to re-learn new habits, and quickly!
I have to say, I thought Micah would show more visible signs of missing Nugget. He doesn’t really seem to look for her or call her at all. I think he has already moved on, but perhaps that is for the best. In the next few months, we will be turning his world upside down – first, his dog is gone, next, we will be bringing a baby home, and then we will be moving from the only house he has ever known. I hope he is able to easily adjust.
In slightly better news, my mom was released from the hospital on Friday afternoon. I’m being a bit cautious about writing this out because we still never seemed to get a firm diagnosis and she is still not feeling great. Since Friday, she has been extremely tired. I understand sickness can wipe you out, but I’m still a bit worried – I would like to see her regain her energy again. She has a bunch of doctors appointments to go to this week, so perhaps we will get some more definitive answers. All we know is that she has been dealing with nausea and stomach issues, that she can eat and function while she is on a ton of anti-nausea meds, and they found fluid in her lungs so they told her it was pneumonia and put her on two antibiotics. They have not yet confirmed by xray that the fluid in her lungs has cleared up (in fact, it had gotten worse on Thursday). I’m hoping at least we can get that cleared up this week.
Micah was a bear to put to bed tonight – he fought and cried for about 45 minutes. We had to go back in a few times, but he just did not want us to leave him alone tonight. I guess I can understand that – some nights, I hate to leave him, too. Micah has been talking more and more every day. He has been stringing two words together (sit down, get out) at times, and he is repeating a lot of words. He has been loving tennis, and he dutifully cheered with me for Rafael Nadal as he won his 5th French Open title today. Every time Rafa hit the ball, Micah would raise his arms and yell “Go!” He saw an apple on my shirt today (I got it at the grand opening of an Apple Store years ago) and he spent the night pointing at it and saying “apple.” He seems to be repeating letters of the alphabet when we show them in a book or on some of the TV shows like Sesame Street and Between the Lions. He also seems to be recognizing some numbers. We have been counting backwards from 20 or 10 every time we change his diaper (he seems to enjoy it and it keeps him still until we get to 1 – not sure why, but it works). The last few days, he tries to count with us – he repeats some of the numbers, and a few times I even *think* he might have said a number or two with me!
As for me – well, I’m shocked this baby hasn’t arrived yet, but a little relieved because I’m not sure how I could handle it. I’ve been contracting every 4-5 minutes for most of the past few days. I’ve had periods when the contractions are stronger, but they do not seem to be converting into full-blown labor yet. I am having a lot of pain/discomfort from the baby when I stand, so I keep thinking we are close. I just hope after all this pre-term labor nonsense I don’t end up going PAST my due date! I really thought she would arrive today. My next guess is June 15, since that is the date for everything else…my parents’ anniversary, my brother’s birthday, and every few years it is Father’s Day, too. I really hope I have the baby this week, though – I have a conference I am supposed to present at on June 26!
So…I’m hanging in there. I’m feeling pretty down a lot – still having some random crying fits here and there. I really hope all of this pre-baby stress doesn’t turn into post-partum depression for me. I’m just worn down right now, and definitely feeling a little blue from everything. I am trying my best to pick myself up by my boot straps, though, but right now it is feeling like a challenge.

Too much going on

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I haven’t been up for posting much lately – I have so much swirling around in my head, and I don’t exactly know where to begin. I think I’m just a bit overwhelmed with all that is going on right now. I think I’m feeling a bit out of control…as my mom says, when man plans, G-d laughs. I think G-d is having quite a good chuckle at my expense this week.

Ironically, I spent most of this pregnancy expecting (and worrying about) pre-term labor. I’m officially 37 weeks pregnant right now, and we are “out of the woods” so to speak. Now, I think my biggest fear is that this baby will stay put forever and I’ll be overdue! I’ve been doing everything I can to clean the house and be prepared. We finally dug all the junk out of our bedroom and the house is about as in-order as it will be. I arranged for child care for Micah when I go into labor, we’ve got our birth plan in place and I’ve got our schedule all written out.

Unfortunately, yesterday a wrench was thrown into my plans…and a whole new worry fell on my plate. My mom was rushed to the hospital in an ambulance yesterday afternoon, and they still do not know what is wrong. She was nauseated and sick and it just wouldn’t stop. It came on suddenly – I was on the phone with her only an hour or two before making plans with her to come join us for dinner. I was extremely worried because it is not like my mom to call an ambulance – I knew she must have been horribly sick to go in an ambulance.

When she arrived at the hospital, they were concerned about a virus or an infection initially, so I’ve been unable to go visit her (she was actually placed in isolation). Since yesterday, they seem to have ruled out any infections, but they do not know exactly what is wrong. One theory is a drug interaction…she started a new medication a few weeks ago, and it might be causing all of this sickness. The only other theory on the table right now seems to be a problem called gastroparesis. I’ve looked into this online (and called a few doctor friends) and this does NOT appear to be good news. It is incurable, and the long-term prognosis is pretty scary. Most of the medications and options are only “temporary” fixes. I’m worried and scared because I *need* my mom to be around a very long time, and I want her to continue to enjoy a full and quality life.

So, on top of all the worries about my mom and her long-term well-being, I am having an immediate selfish reaction, too. I want my mom to be there with me when I give birth. She was such a huge help during labor last time, and I want her to be there right away to meet her newest granddaughter – and right now, she can’t be there. I just know that I will go into labor when she is out of commission, and I’m a bit worried about doing all of this without her (and I also don’t want her to miss out, either, because I know she wants to be a part of it all). I know that I will have Elliot there, but it really was a 2-person effort (okay, 3 counting the midwife) to get me through the last time. I also feel better knowing that after I deliver, my mom will be there with my Dad in the evenings to feed Micah and put him to bed.

Now I’m torn – I’m physically ready to have this baby, but I kind of want her to hang in a bit longer in the hope that my mom can recover and be there. Today was my 37 week appointment. I am over 70% effaced and 1-2 cm dilated. The baby has dropped (she did not say what station, but the baby is much lower and engaged). My belly is now measuring at 34 weeks (down 1 cm from last week). I’ve been spotting like crazy all day and having contractions. It kind of hurts for me to stand because of all the pressure. I also received some bad news at the appointment – I tested positive for Group B Strep :(. That means they would like to recommend that I take IV antibiotics during labor. I’m very torn – the studies about the benefits of IV antibiotics are mixed. It is the standard recommendation, and part of me knows that it would be better for the baby to take the antibiotics. But…I just don’t know that I can do the IV because of my phobia. We are talking to the midwives to see if they will prescribe a course of oral antibiotics for me to start taking now. It is not the recommended course, but I would feel like it was a fair compromise. I tend to have short labors – the greatest risk for spreading infection is longer labor, and I barely had 6 hours from when my water broke to when Micah was born the last time around. Something else for me to worry about, right?

I’m still worried about how to deal with 2 children, and our child care situation for next year, and how we can balance all that is going on with our home renovations. We are supposed to be putting my condo on the market this week – I sure hope it sells quickly and that we are able to break ground quickly, move without incident, and get a 3 bedroom place before Twoey outgrows our bedroom. I’m having a hard time seeing how everything is going to fall into place.

I also have to take the dog back to the vet tomorrow. Her heart condition has been deteriorating. We increased her dosage of lasix in the hope that the congestion in her lungs would improve. While I’ve noticed some improvement, she has been waking in the mornings with a cough and she has been breathing heavily. I do not think the vet is going to be able to reduce her medication as we had hoped, and I see another visit to the cardiologist in our future. I wish I knew when we could fit all of this into our crazy life.

I guess on a more upbeat note, I thought I’d share a few stories about Micah. His new favorite pasttime is to put cereal (or fruit) on his eyes. He just takes the food and mushes it in there, and then he laughs! I’ve been working on teaching him some new “phrases.” I’ve been teaching him to respond “me” (and point to himself) when I ask him “Who is cute?” He seems to get the concept…but our exchange goes more like this….”Micah, who is cute?” “Neee.” Yes, Micah says “nee” instead of “me.” I’ve noticed some other signs of growth – he actually lets me wipe his nose without any complaints anymore! In fact, he’ll show me he needs his nose wiped, or I can say “Micah, come here and let mommy wipe your nose” and he’ll walk right over and let me do what I need to do. I’ve also been amazed by the way he handles a sippy cup – he’ll spin it around until he finds the right angle (right side up). I love watching him twirl the cup around in a circle until he find the perfect position! Another funny story…Elliot was dressing Micah the other morning. I had given him the clothes and walked into the kitchen to clean up after breakfast. I glanced over at the two of them…and had to point out to Elliot that I usually prefer to take the pajamas OFF before dressing him! We had a good laugh over that. Finally, our latest challenge has been tempertantrums. Micah is definitely entering the terrible twos. We are finding meal time particularly difficult. He will throw a fit and chuck his food on the floor. I cannot decide if he throws a fit because we let him get too hungry, or if it is because he has very specific wants and we just keep guessing wrong. Either way, it has made meal time a bit of a challenge. Sometimes, it is as simple as giving him the WHOLE pancake instead of cutting it up. Other times, we have to just give up and give him fruit. I hope things get easier.

We have had a few incidents with “aggressive behavior” from Micah. Apparently, he bit another child at daycare on Friday. I think some of his behavior has a lot to do with his lack of language – he gets frustrated and does not know how to express it. I am working on his language and trying to teach him appropriate behaviors. I hope that we can get through this phase soon. If anyone has any suggestions, I’m happy to listen! I’m also a bit concerned about some of these behaviors because of our family history with ADD. I think later this summer I am going to take Micah to get evaluated. I do not think we’ll get any type of diagnosis at such a young age, but I’m hoping maybe the doctor can give me some good techniques for managing his behavior and pointing him in a better direction.

Okay – I guess that is all I’ve got right now. Keep your fingers crossed that everything falls into place and works out better than I have planned. Also, a little good news about my mom tomorrow would be great, too.

Happy Birthday, Elliot!

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Today was Elliot’s birthday – his first one as a Daddy. I’m sure I don’t ever say this often enough, but Elliot is a wonderful husband and father. He is absolutely one of the kindest people I know, and it is clear to everyone how much he adores Micah. We always manage to have fun together, and I am so glad to be sharing my life with him!

Unfortunately, I think today was a bit of a disappointment, though – it was an entirely underwhelming birthday. A lot of that was my fault – it has been crazy around here, so I did not plan anything really big or special for today. I was having a hard time coming up with a gift idea, so I finally just asked him what he wanted and told him I’ll order it later this week. I’ve been racking my brains trying to think of a good idea, and he always goes so far out for me, and I feel awful. I was toying with taking him out to dinner tonight just the three of us, but we decided to reschedule family dinner for my mom’s birthday (and Elliot’s) to tonight. So, we braved horrible rush hour traffic to meet my parents, Jen, Jeremy, Paige and Peyton halfway in Columbia at the Olive Garden. Fancy dinner, right? We needed a good family restaurant, so it really was perfect. Micah enjoyed breadsticks, pasta, minestrone soup and pizza. I love watching him eat real food! The girls were adorable, and we had a fun night.

I think Elliot also got a bit short-changed on the cake. I had grand intentions of making him a Bugs Bunny cake this year, but with my edible image printer broken, I just don’t seem to have the bandwidth to freehand the bunny. Since we were also sharing the celebration with my mom, Elliot didn’t even get his own cake – it was a joint cake with my mom! (I guess my mom was short-changed, too – she had to share the cake with Elliot!) I just made a very simple cake – a delicious chocolate truffle cake decorated simply with buttercream icing and chocolate icing. I made some pretty fondant stars on wire and had them spraying out from the cake. It tasted yummy.

In better news, we do have a fun night planned for date night – we are going to a nice Indian restaurant for dinner, and we’ll wander around for dessert and enjoy the beautiful weather. Perhaps we’ll also grab a movie if there is time. I did come up with one good idea that did not exactly pan out as I had hoped. We’ve been wanting to go eat at Volt (for those of you who are watching Top Chef, it is Bryan Voltaggio’s place), so I called and made reservations. Unfortunately, the first available Thursday night reservations were not until October 29, so I took those and plan to take Elliot to part two of his birthday celebration there. When I mentioned this to Elliot, he said he’d rather go in November and celebrate our anniversary there, so perhaps my fun birthday surprise will become an anniversary gift instead.

In Micah news, we have entered the world of diaper acrobatics. Trying to change Micah’s diaper is a major undertaking. He flips over, climbs up the walls, stands – pretty much anything to make diapering impossible. Half of the time, we diaper him while he is standing! The diapers are never on properly, and it is a constant struggle while he complains loudly and fights us. We’ve tried toys (for some reason, he seems to enjoy playing with the thermometer the most), but those no longer seem to be holding his interest. I think I’m ready for potty training!

You know you have become a mom when . . . .

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I’ve started to notice that I’ve become a total “mom” – doing all those things I swore I would never do. In honor of that fact, I thought I’d write this post – please feel free to add your own!

You know you have become a mom when . . . .

  • you see a booger up your child’s nose, and don’t think twice about picking it.
  • your child sneezes and you use your hands . . . or shirt . . . or anything else you can easily grab to start wiping all the mucous away.
  • you see schmutz on your child’s face, and you automatically lick your finger to wipe it off (please note – I ALWAYS wash my hands in between wiping away the snot and licking my finger to wipe away the schmutz).
  • you think it is acceptable to pick up your child to sniff his/her tush to determine if the diaper has poop in it.
  • you can just pick up your child and know he/she needs a diaper change because of the increased weight.
  • you feel the need to talk to your child about the stinkiness of the poop in his/her diaper . . . even though your child does not yet understand you.
  • you don’t really care whether you have recently showered . . . or put on makeup . . . or put on an outfit that isn’t elastic and loose.
  • you have to choose between showering and eating.
  • you are proud of yourself for only accomplishing one thing all day.
  • you spend most of your days discussing poop . . . and possibly breastfeeding, pumping, or bottles.
  • you know exactly how many outfits your child has worn (and pooped through) in a given day.
  • you rate your day based upon the number of poop explosions you have had to face.
  • people ask how you are doing and you launch into a monologue about how your little one is growing/developing/sleeping/eating/pooping.
  • you start to consider getting rid of furniture to make room for toys.
  • you go to the store to pick up one toy . . . and spend an obscene amount of money and come home loaded with cool stuff (remind me to post a picture of my haul from today’s shopping trip!)
  • you spend 3 hours trying to go to the bathroom . . . or take your medicine. . . . or eat breakfast . . . and realize you still haven’t succeeded.
  • you get excited about a night of . . . . fun . . . with your husband, and can’t believe the baby throws a wrench in your plans by waking up, screaming, and needing to come into bed with you.
  • after feeding, you spend a lot of time coaxing your child into burping, and then cheer and say “good, boy” (or “good, girl”) after the offensive sound has been successfully elicited.
  • your child releases an impressive demonstration of flatulence, and you turn and say “feeling better, sweetie?”

Okay – that is all I’ve got right now . . . I’m sure there will be more another day. Please, post a few of yours!